Holli Rausch

Currently reading: Captivating, by John and Stasi Eldredge; The Book of Isaiah

1 Peter 3:3-4 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.”

I received Captivating as a Christmas present from my potential future roommates Sara, Danielle, and Kensi. It is the book for women, that Wild at Heart was for men. It repeats the question John and Stasi claim to be the question all little girls want answered, “Am I lovely?” To me, this question brings about many others. Am I desired? Am I interesting? Am I captivating? Am I beautiful?

Ahh, beauty. So many women and girls have a distorted view of what this word means, myself included. I’ve known this word to both destroy and uplift women, that’s how powerful this word can be. A friend of mine said that she doesn’t feel put together or confident unless she is dressed up. I know lots of people who feel this way. I don’t find this weak at all, I like to be dressed up sometimes as well. I find those women beautiful in all aspects; but she is downplaying the true beauty of her inner-self. I don’t know the whole story, of course. Maybe something was said to her while she was not “put together” and that’s wounded her, forcing her to choose not to be vulnerable again. Perhaps she just wants to look her best. We all do.

I know other girls who find beauty through how men see them. She will bounce from man to man, never truly feeling beautiful because what is beauty? She will not be secure with the woman she is, as lovely as she is, and will look for someone to desire her…until she becomes so insecure that she fears he’ll one day stop desiring her and decides not to wait for that day to come. She moves on to the next man. She doesn’t wait until she knows who she is or where her beauty lies, so that she can share her beauty with someone in a relationship…she hopes to find that through a relationship.

Beauty is how woman was created. Eve was created in beauty. Woman isn’t intended to wear layer upon layer of makeup to receive a false sense of beauty. Nor is she intended to spend day after day trying to fit into a size 4 dress to maybe be told she looks beautiful, for one night. No. Beauty has been misshapen over the years. Today, a woman believes beauty to be having the perfect hair, the perfect teeth, the perfect skin, the perfect body. This image of beauty is confirmed when one sees perfect women, not themselves, attracting men. The truth is, we all are wounded. Some horribly worse than others and we can’t seem to believe the kind of things some men and women go through.

Many women feel that, by the way. We can’t put words to it, but down deep we fear there is something terribly wrong with us. If we were the princess, then our prince would have come. If we were the daughter of a king, he would have fought for us. We can’t help but believe that if we were different, if we were better, then we would have been loved as we so longed to be. (Captivating, Stasi Elderedge)

Beauty isn’t something one can define. Even if it were able to be, I wouldn’t attempt it. Each woman creates her own beauty from her own experiences. Her beauty shines every day, not because of how many layers of lipstick she’s put on, but because she was created in that glory. God intends women to be beautiful.

Am I lovely? Of course, I am. You are too. Be the person God created you to be. Be beautiful.